Wednesday, October 3, 2012

A Little Vote

(not to scale)


Our Emerald Isle – A Little Vote

 

Two years ago an astounding thing happened in Devere, a Leprechaun was elected to the village council.  This had never happened before.  The Leprechaun community is not large nor were active in Devere politics before that and never seemed to agree on anything amongst themselves as a group anyway.  The Catholic and Protestant majority would always court the “Little” vote as it was referred to and now and then throw a shamrock their way but all in all the “Little” vote was not considered important let alone a threat.

 

From out of the green however a leader arose from the Leprechaun community that was able to pull all the different “little” factions together.  He was a little taller, a little less green and more educated than most Leprechaun’s.   His rhetoric was superb, his ability to speak about how things should be, and the wholesomeness and kindness he projected appealed to all those historically ignored and appealed to more than just a few of the Catholics and Protestants who were normally at odds with each other anyway. 

 

It was the first time a Leprechaun had run for office as a serious candidate and the Leprechauns along with the dwarf community voted in a block.  That along with the disenfranchised Catholics and Protestants  John Littleman was elected councilperson of District Two.  District Two just so happens to be the district Dever’s Pub is located and Dever’s has the added distinction of being the polling place for the village.  It is a great honor and I respect the fact that the sale of alcohol is not allowed until one has casts his or her vote.

 

After John Littleman took office it seems like he could do nothing right and was unsuccessful or least that is what the Catholics and Protestants that had not defected to John’s side contended.  They had a point because every time he would introduce a village ordinance it would either be shelved or voted down.   The promises he had made he was unable to fulfill and he took much abuse from those who were against his policies.  Most of those who were opposed to what he espoused did so because they considered his positions radical but those who were most opposed to him, were so because he was a Leprechaun.  They let those who opposed John Littleman, based on his governmental philosophy, take the lead in the vocal opposition while the anti Leprechaun forces egged the others on and financed the hate campaign hidden from critical analysis.   

 

John Littleman was a gentleman though and took the attacks and hidden slander in stride and just chalked it all up to politics.  Because of his success at least to being elected some other Leprechauns and one Dwarf decided to run for the council seats coming up for election this November. 

 

The village council has realized that if the Leprechauns, Dwarfs, and disgruntled Protestants and Catholics voted as a group again the village “will be run by a bunch of midgets,” I have heard it said more than once in Dever’s.

 

To counter this threat the village council passed an ordinance that stated that milk crates would no longer be provided by the village election commission for those who happened to be too short to reach the counter of the polling booth.  The ordinance went on the say however that any voter could bring their own device that would boost them vertically but only after a safety inspection certificate was provided to the election commissionaires certifying that the device used was not a hazard.

 

A protest was immediately made by John Littleman to the village council.  He demanded to know why after all these years such an ordinance was necessary.  In unison the other members of the council said nothing.

 

I don’t know if not having milk crates provided by village expense immediately made available for those wanting to cast a vote will hinder the Leprechaun and Dwarf turn out or not.  They are allowed to bring their own the ordinance says and the people who support the measure insist it is because of the liability issue and besides “what is the big deal anyway, if one is too lazy to get their own milk crate they shouldn’t vote.”  

 

In our weekly Dever’s Pub business meeting the matter was discussed and we thought that perhaps we could rent milk crates at the font door when people came into vote if one was needed.   Then when they finished voting they could redeem the milk crate at the bar and get a “free” drink.  Bev suggested that if people turned in a milk crate that we had not rented we would charge half of what we normally would and thus create a surplus of milk crates for the next election to be rented at a reduced price because of the decrease in capital expenditures.  How does she come up with these ideas?  Anyway I have not played politics for a long time and only getting involved now reluctantly, but the combination of doing ones civic duty and making a dollar or two is irresistible.   

 

  

 

2 comments:

  1. "In unison the other members of the council said nothing." Love that line!
    Janelle

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    Replies
    1. well I guess it was a pretty good one. Just sort of came out of no where. Thanks for the kind words.

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